The Russel Brand/Jonathan Ross Row: 6/10

Am I the only person in this country who doesn't give a shit about the row over lewd messages left by Jonathan Ross and Russel Brand on Andrew Sachs's answerphone?

We're on the brink of recession in Britain; hundreds of thousands of people could lose their jobs; many will lose their homes. And THIS is the top story of the day? A story about a pair of overgrown, overpaid juveniles who made obscene, prank calls, broadcasting to the world that Russell Brand had sex with Sachs's granddaughter (he did, three times, according to her).

At first I sympathised with Georgina Baillie, described, rather charitably, by The Daily Telegraph as "the leader of a dance troupe" (failing to mention said troupe is burlesque performers The Satanic Sluts). Until I read that she was represented by the arch-purveyor of celebrity scandal, Max Clifford. And until I read the piece in today's Sun.

Georgina is clearly not as disgusted or as upset as she makes out. She takes her kit off for a living. She's made a mint our of this story. And she'll be on some televisual tosh like I'm a Celebrity within a year, no doubt.

But I digress. Why should we care? And why the hell is Prime Minister Gordon Brown - who probably hasn't even heard or read the offending material - wading into the row as well? Ah, but there were almost 20,000 complaints, I hear you say - and how many of them would have complained without the media's obsessive coverage (there were just two complaints on the night).

"It's what everyone in the pub will be talking about tonight," asserted a fellow hack, in defence of his station's blanket coverage. But that's only because every paper's running with it on its front page and because supposedly serious stations like Sky News spent the entire day discussing it.

Okay, so maybe the nation is a bit sick and tired of reading or hearing about plunging stock markets, repossessions and financial meltdown. But enough is enough. I just hope and pray that Brand's resignation means that we can get back to talking about the more important things in life.